I'm not ready to go through the motions.
Not ready to have her stocking hang there... empty.
Not ready to wish she would make that always annoying call "When will you be here". I really hated when she'd call asking that question. Now I want her to call. I thought about that call last weekend when we went to her side of the family's Christmas. I cried in the car thinking about it.
Just more firsts to get through.
You wanna know what else? I hate that my Inspirational Blog is just a mess. Inconsistent posts, sad posts that are no where near inspiring... not me anymore. I need to fix that... and you have all been so very supportive and patient. That almost makes it worse, having friends I've never met or some I've just met once that stand by me. I have guilt issues and I feel guilty I'm not posting. My following is small but it's mine....
I have to get back into the things I love.
I need to let go of this sadness that keeps my spirit suppressed.
I need to go shopping--then post every cool thing on here and then pin them all to Pinterest. Honestly, Pinterest and IG are like easy posts... just inspiration at the push of a button, no editing, no writing.... but I miss the writing.
I'm here... waiting to get past this first.
My latest IG Self Portrait... sweatshirt and headphones while I clean.
I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy Holiday.
Cheers and Love~Ivy
1 shared thoughts:
Ivy, Christmas is bound to be rough this year and I'm sorry you have to go through it. We're home from Georgia, with Sean's family who is also trying to get through a first year. I'm thinking of you and hoping you and your family have the best Christmas possible. Hang in there :)
Post a Comment